Independent

Sunday, March 7, 2010 at 10:38 AM
Most of us arent very independent, we rely a lot on our friends, families to stay alive.. Me too, im rather dependent on friends and families too.

Well, just last wk, God placed sbdy to be with me in my section, but then its only temporary.. This guy was none other than Dextre who was in the m113 section. As our section is short of manpower and he has just came back from his driving course... so he was asked to join our section. At first i tot it wud be a permanent one, but only to realise its only temp.. Actually with his presence, it rly did help me a lot. Why? Cos he's also in the same church as me.. CHC!! Yeah.. fellow bros in christ!! That made it easier for us to get along wif each other. Although sometimes will get chided by my sgt, but his presence is just like "God".. upon seeing him, all my worries and frustrations will be gone.. he's just like an angel sent by God. At first i got to know dex thru sushi, my oje mate.. they were in m113.. first time din noe he was a christian, as his attitude dun rly show.. only thru this time den i got to noe he's also a chc-ian too! It was rly a jubilant news.. to noe that someone of the same church is in the same section as me!!

But however... as i said, he's only temporary.. and plus, next 2 wks he'll be having ICT.. so he wun be around.. thus its back to where i am again.. thats why i nd to be independent.. i think God wants me to be independent.. by taking him away from me.. God wants me to survive on my own.. i hope i can do so.. becos i've been quite reliant on dex ever since he came to our section last wk.. i rly hope he can stay with us for longer periods.. but well.. maybe God just wan me to be more independent so he took dex away..

So well i hope i can be more independent...

Peace and serenity... listening to some peaceful melody is wad i want now...

Doing yoga on the beach...

Imagination..

Independent!!

I can do it!!

RAH!

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BOO

at 10:09 AM
BOO!!~ I hate LAB!! I loathe it to the core!!!

Becos of LAB, we have been so busy busy busy... everyday OT OT OT... its all LAB's fault!!

Sometimes when i go camp, rly dun hav the passion n drive to work, but still must force myself to.. I just can't help it.. i dun like to sweat (not that much) like a bucket of water.. i hate to get inside that confined space.. worse still, i have to squat like mad everytime... i dun like to squat and can't squat that long, it will cause my foot to be very painful!! Haiz... anyway, LAB is coming in ONE week's time... after that, we'll have ICT... eveyrthing will only die down in 12th april.. by then it will be more relaxed.. but but.. still gotta wait so long!! Arghhhh!! I can't wait any longer!!

How i wish i dun have to do all these unnecessary stuff anymore.. afterall they are just some useless piece of scrap metal waiting to be destroyed sooner or later. Ns ns ns.. i hate it to the core!! I rly hate it... why must i be in the most suckiest section out of all the sections in my platoon?? WHY?? Why..God why... did u place me to be here??!!

I rly just wish i can slack all day long...... no nd to do anything... isn't that gd?? I can't stand the amt of workload.. everytime i go to office after breakfast, straightaway its work work work.. other sections still can sit down n rest.. why i can't?? And many at times, there's no breaks at all... not until the last hr.. where everyone packing up and rdy to bkout..

On another note, my sis has just flown to genting... so gd sia.. i wanna go tooo!! I feel like gg to another place out of here.... rmbing the times i went to tioman island, it was just splendid!! Truly a getaway indeed!! I just want to bask in an open space under the big sun.. and listen to the calm waves of the sea and enjoying the cool sea breeze... when will i ever get to do that again?? Its been quite some time since i get to enjoy sun, sand and sea... rly feel like gg to enjoy it once more... the last time i been to these places were our oeti cohesion outing at sentosa... it was a day of fun and laughter.. most enjoyed..

Kk la, nth much to say liao... only can say, the road ahead lies even more... so yeah, life just moves on... it just moves on...

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1 word... Uncertainty

Tuesday, February 16, 2010 at 11:40 AM
First and foremost, i wonder if anybody still reads my blog here.. anyways, wadever. hahhhs..

The topic is Uncertainty.. Why?? Becos im so uncertain of many things, so unsure of wad to do now and then.

Its like... im already thinking.. wat am i gg to do after i ord?? The "traditional" way would be to enrol in a university to continue studying.. but with that meagre gpa of mine, i dun even noe i can qualify for a local u or not.. plus, im not sure wad course i wan to pursue too.. im so vexed.

Can i blame NS for all these that have happened?? NS is nothing but just piece of crap.. waste time waste ppl effort only. If not for ns, i would have already set out a path on wad to do after i grad from poly.. but becos of ns, i gotta wait for 2 long yrs before i can do anything.. and somehow or rather, my mind have "degraded".. i can't think like before again.. no longer quick witted and all.. ns just really transforms ppl to slow and useless creatures.. ns.. all ns fault!!

Wad hav ns done in my life so far?? Nothing!! From the start.. BMT to OETI to my current unit.. it does NOTHING at all!! So wtf i need ns for?? Seriously no point at all..

Argghhh.. now is the period to apply for universtites admission but i just dun feel like doing it.. im so uncertain wad to do.. shud i just wait after ord then decided wad to do? or shud i decided now?? dammm... this ns is like taking my life away.. i dunno wad to do except to rot here and let days go by.. i dun seem to do anything productive anymore..

Actually my mind is thinking, maybe i'll go SIM or private u to study.. or maybe just find a job elsewhere but hopefully the job is a gd one then i just be content and happy.. like my cousin lester, he's now working as an IT support for his company.. that's cool.. so shud i rly go further my studies or go into the working world after ord?? This is rly wad puzzles me.. i dunno wad i shud do..

Anyways.. there's still a long way before ord.. so dun rly feel like thinking abt it.. no pt thinking abt it too.. haiiz..

I just feel like rotting.. haaiiz... no purpose life.. godammn it sucks!

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Vent

Friday, February 12, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Yoyoyoyoyoyoyo, i havent blogged for quite some time already.

Anyways, just to kinda vent out my frustrations.. i will spill some beans here.

Well well, its been 2 mths since i set foot into my new camp in SGC and which will be my "home" for the next 1 and 1/2 yrs.

Generally, i got to know my platoon mates more in-depth and also other mates from other platoons.

However, my own section is... not say bad la, but a bit not-so-gd.. why?

Cos of a fk-ed up sgt of mine.. i noe he doesnt like me, neither do i.. he's really my "yan zhong ding".. i rly can't stand him and he can't stand me too.

First things first, i hate his kind of tone towards me, always so harsh and so unfeeling.. even the way he acts is also quite punkish.. typical ITE guy la..

Next, he always like to aim at me even for the slightest thing.. yes i noe at first im not that gd, i dunno anything, i keep asking him to show me do this do that and when i can't rmb them just becos i dun hav a gd memory, he come n f me upside down.. WTF! Ppl make mistakes lor.. if nobody makes mistakes, then everyone is perfect liao isn't it?? I rly hate it manzz..

Third, i feel he's very controlling.. like where i go and what i do also must let him noe.. yes i noe its impt to tell ur seniors abt ur whereabouts.. but the feeling he giving me is too much too much to the extent like u want to tie someone to a rope like dat. If thats the case, might as well find a rope and tie me to a pole so i wun run away.. isn't it?? I rly hate it whenever go toilet or just wanna go somewhere else i tell him already, he will say go, but with a "faster" behind and also harsh tone and mannerisms.. can't he just act a bit more manneristic??

Worse comes to worst, he just likes to scold and tekan me.. guess im just too easy to be bullied huh.. fking hell.. and sometimes i piss off, i just heck care him but i din shout back at him, which i wanted to but dared not. Even tho i din shout at him, he tot i giving him some attitude.. yes i show attitude cos i not happy.. if u not happy would u show attitude?? So does that mean he is the only one who can show attitude when he not happy and not me??? We are all human beings we will get angry too..

Think abt this, if u are gg to work with someone for almost 1 yr plus, and u already dun like that person or want to make hell with that person.. how then are u gg to COOPERATE with that person to get the job done faster and better together?? Imagine if u keep shouting at one another, scolding f*** u to one another, is it gg to get any better?? Just so u noe u gonna be stuck with that guy for like almost 1 and 1/2 yr plus?? If i were HIM, i rather make life easier for my juniors.. rather than tekan-ing them, but teaching them the proper methods seriously but sincerely.. so that they can appreciate wad i am teaching them.. instead me scolding them and making them hate me forever.. its not going to work well if we r working in a team..

Army is the same..everything is abt teamwork.. if that fk-ed up sgt of mine wants to make my life hell, it is not gg to work out nicely cos there wun be any cooperation at all.. why can't he think of making life better for me and him and for the rest of our section mates..?? Why must he really pin me to the core and make me his "yan zhong ding" and i the same to him too?? There is a path for him to choose, why must he choose the hard path?? Tekan me also no use.. it will just make me hate him more and bring the whole team morale down.. i dun understand seriously.

Alrightsss.. enuf of that fk-ed up sgt of mine.. he's not the only one, there is still a staff sgt who kinda acts as a big fk.. and also some of my seniors.. i noe they are more pro and skilled than me and finds me work slow dun give a fk or wadever.. yes im bad.. but they as seniors shud be more encouraging and more understanding.. well wadever..

Anyways, yes im at fault too.. but they themselves also have their faults.. no one is perfect.. so actually i can't rly blame anyone here.. but just hope things will get on for the better.. as i seriously can't stand HIM anymore..

God, pls come and help me and curb my feelings.. i wish for better days ahead! Esp in camp!!

Alrights, this is just to vent out my frustrations and all....

Nitez everyone!

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1st post for 2010

Saturday, January 2, 2010 at 2:30 AM

Hello earthlings! Welcome to the world of 2010!!

Yeah.. this is my FIRST post for 2010.. first of all, HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

Just an update on New Year’s Eve…

Morning attended Coy Cohesion at Jurong Safra, Joy Garden Restaurant. Had an 8 course meal with dessert.. yummy! Then watched movie 2 Fast 2 Furious while eating. Thing ended at ard 1pm.. after that went home.

At abt 8pm, went out to meet Dom and gang at Orchard. Together got 7 of us – Me, dom, wei xiang, joseph, sia, joel and yong biao. COOL~ Seldom can go out as one big group.. some more its NEW YEAR’S EVE.. and we TONNED the whole night thru.. FUN but TIRING!! Ok.. from orchard, we proceeded to Dhoby wanting to play pool or LAN, but too bad all full so went eat tau huay at Rochor Beancurd there. Nice!! as always…

Then slowly walk to Clark Quay to find a pub. In the end, we went to Beer Belly pub at Boat Quay.. Nice pub with gd ambience.. and got KTV too. Me and joel sang some songs when it was our turn.. Superwoman the pitch was damn HIGH.. then xing fu bu mie also.. overall had gd time there. Left pub at 230am and walked to Lau Pa Sat for supper.. after that everyone tired le.. walked to Raffles MRT and sat at the grass patch. Some tired went to slp while some chatted the whole night. As for me, ZZZ monster came and attacked me so… yeah.

Woke up at 6am, ready to take the first train home.. my oh my, it was a CROWD!! Can only take the 2nd train after like 11 mins?? Damn.. reached home at 7 and KO-ed immed… So thats how i spent new year’s eve!!

Indeed a great NEW YEAR EVE!! Hope can have more outings in this kind of groups in future.. :D

BYEBYE and HAPPY NEW YEAR again!!

Next up~ Resolutions… nitez!

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Platoon Cohesion Day

Thursday, December 24, 2009 at 1:33 PM

 

Okays, well i have not been updating my blog for quite some time due to
1) BUSYNESS and also..
2) LOWDTNB (Lost Of Words Due To Long Time Nv Blog) Syndrome.

So, first of all, got my posting 1 wk ago. And my fate is sealed. Gedong will be my “home” for the remaining 1 yr 7 mths. Life in Gedong isn’t that gd.. everyday got work to do, do and do.. until so tired and so dirty.. really.. and finally its HSH (home swt home) time. BUT, sometimes might have to OT if cant finish work on time.. so.. gotta prepare.. especially nxt month, which is the HIGH KEY period, will get loads of OT and loads of BUSYNESS until i can’t even imagine..

Anyways, yesterday was my Platoon Cohesion Day held at the SAF Changi Seaview Resort.. a very nice chalet with a beautiful seaview.. its really good to stay there with ur family frens and loved ones.. So ytd was good but not really THAT good, cos of the company.. it was kinda boring actually during OTOT.. nth to do.. just talk cock and walk about by ur own self. No lah, with my OETI section mate.. the one who got posted tgt with me, Sushi. So ytd me and sushi were mostly by ourselves while the rest of them were in their groups doing things together such as PSP-ing, Talk cock-ing, Mahjong-ing and Dai Dee-ing.. actually i wanna play Dai Dee and Mahjong de.. but they play money.. and some more its very big.. so u can win big or lose even bigger! Therefore i nv play..

At ard evening time, BBQ and Steamboat for dinner.. ate many foods.. chicken wings, satay etc etc.. then after that all the BIG SHOTS came at atd 8pm.. OTOT again until 9 plus.. they called us 2 OJEs down to drink.. Master DJ is really pro in drinking.. keep drinking non-stop.. then ask me and sushi to drink as well.. So we drank under forced circumstances.. lol, one glass.. Guess wad was it? It was HARD LIQOUR (CHIVAS) + Coke! Fortunately the coke was more than the Chivas.. so still ok.. when i drank it at first it tasted BITTER.. VERY VERY BITTER … then got that BURNING SENSATION inside the stomach.. after that i feel a bit giddy and went upstairs to rest.. fortunately nth happened.. i didn’t have a hangover or sth. :) At ard 10pm, we had a celebration for the DEC BABIES and ORD Personnels.. log cake! I want to eat.. but nv get to eat.. lol.. Then aft that GIFT EXCHANGE.. i got a very gd gift! yay.. and finally 1030, some of us make our way home… take 29 to Tamp Int and then take mrt all the way home..

I guess thats all.. no pics as i have no camera.. sadly.. so BYEBYE!

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Goodbye OETI!

Wednesday, December 9, 2009 at 9:08 PM
Today is officially the End Of Course day for me in OETI. So fast... time really flies. Still rmbing when i first came to OETI, i rly abhored the place.. its old, dirty, looks haunted... how can it be a "heaven" for ppl? But now, i truly feel that it is really "heaven" and i rly cant bear to leave the place, and the staff sgts and instructors.. they are all nice ppl.

Tmr will receive the posting result, its either gedong or kranji. Most likely its a stay-in. Really dunno where i am gg to go. Just hope it is a good one and got a few good or close ppl same unit as me that will be gd enuf. Cos its gg to be for 1 yr 7 mths! Its definitely a decision for life as to where i will be and what kind of live i will be living for the rest of the 1 yr 7 mths of my life in ns.

Passing out also means that i am now a qualified technician, but i know i am not.. Even if ask me to go repair vehicle now, i will still struggle with a question mark on my head. But the fact is im already a qualified technician... ah well.

Next is my relationship with the rest of the trainees. Overall, i would say i have a moderate kind of relationship with them. Still not very close yet. I guess its just hard for me to click with them not knowing what to say at times. I tried very very very hard to be like "one of them" but i still dun seem to be "one of them".

'Nuff said...

Life is hard.. gotta move on to the next chapter of life.

If i had a choice, i'd rather not be born into this world so i wun have to experience all these bitterness that im experiencing now.

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